The Running Man

I felt like revisiting this Arnie film that most people do not think of when thinking about Arnie films.

And no wonder as it is pretty bad really, even Arnie himself was not happy with it. The original director was fired just one week into filming, and was replaced by Starsky, of Starsky & Hutch fame. Arnie was not happy about that, his muscle-senses told him it was a bad idea, and he was right. The Stephen King written story was very linear, repeated some past Arnie one-liners (“I’ll be back”), had bad hair, bad 80’s dancers (choreographed by Paula Abdul), and some of the sets and props were just plain cheapo.

Also in this film were Dweezil Zappa (only two lines), Mick Fleetwood, Richard Dawson (Hogan’s Heroes) who was the best thing in this whole mess, Jesse Ventura, and Edward Bunker.

Avoid, re-watch Raw Deal instead.

Date watched: November 27th
Score: 4/10
Film count 2015: 148

Do watch this though…

And here is a funny joke from Kenny Everett…

Escape Plan

I thought I would watch this to see how The Stallones and Arnie are doing these days, not expecting much.

They are both getting old, but they seem to be able to still do their action bits just fine. I was expecting a bit more from Arnie though, there were no one-liners up until the last 30 minutes or so, and it was low on comedy relief. It did have the typical final scene where The Stallones walks away from the camera and makes a funny quip followed by a laugh, then freeze frame.

But the best scene involved a security camera with The Stallones saying “Say cheese!” followed by a big Arnie grin as he looked at the camera. And we also got to hear Arnie speaking German, the first time I have ever heard him speak his own language on film. He was doing a rant, and one website review I read after watching this said he could be the next Klaus Kinski, hehe!

The rest of it was entertaining on a basic level, all the thrills and spills expected from a film of this type, lots of head bashing, shooting, and the odd explosion. There was one scene which started off with great promise. Arnie was trying to get into a military helicopter to escape but The Stallones was late getting there, so to buy some time he disconnected one of the those big machine guns they have on helicopters, then the camera changed to a slow motion face shot of Arnie turning around with a “I’m gonna shoot the crap out of everything like I did in that jungle scene in Predator with that gatling gun” look on his face. I was thinking the next cut to him mowing down baddies was going to be great, but it fizzled out, just showing him gunning down a small hand full of guys and not an explosion in sight. It could have been the scene of the film, but wasn’t.

Overall though, it was a mildly entertaining film. I don’t care if I don’t see a The Stallones film again, but I would love to see more Arnie, perhaps in a comedy because he is good at that, perhaps teaming up with Danny DeVito again for Twins 2.

Date watched: August 5th
Score: 7/10
Film count 2015: 104

You can see a bit of Arnie’s slow-mo scene at 2:12…

The Expendables

I am almost embarrassed to admit I got this out, but I felt like a stupid action flick again.

It had lots of pretty explosions, heads of bad guys blowing up or being chopped off, big guns, Jason Stratham, knife throwing, naughty dictators of a small but beautiful island country with oppressed people who like to sell things in markets on the streets so bad guys in cars can run over them during dramatic car chases, and so on.

Bruce and Arnie were in it but only for a few minutes each, just cameos. Arnie was asked to join the group to go and kick island dictator bottom, but he refused. Here is the snappy dialogue from that scene:

Trench (Arnie): Oh, like I said. I’m busy anyway, so give this job to my friend here. He loves playing in the jungle. Right?
Barney Ross (Stallones): [sarcastically] Right.
Mr. Church (Bruce): [Uncertain] That’s right.
Trench: [to Barney] Hey, why don’t we have dinner?
Barney Ross: Sure. When?
Trench: In a thousand years?
Barney Ross: Too soon.
[Trench walks off]
Mr. Church: [Confused; about Trench] What’s his fucking problem?
Barney Ross: He wants to be president.

Nice!

All rather silly violent fun that I will never watch again. I do want to see the sequel though, it has the Chuckers in it.

Date watched: February 7th
Stuff blowing up score: 9/10
Inventive ways of killing bad guys: 4/10
One liners (except for the Arnie dialogue): 3/10
Jason Stratham score: 10/10
Mickey Rourkes mustache: 7/10
Film count 2013: 16

Mickey Rourke

Terminator 3

Another film I barely remember watching, probably wasn’t paying much attention to it first time around.

This was on TV the other day so I recorded it and watched it tonight. I have not recorded and watched a film on TV for some years.

Anyways, it was just another blockbuster action flick, and just a re-hash of the first two films really. Even Arnie’s one liners were a bit tired.

I’ll have to check out T4 to see if that is any better.

Date watched: November 24th
Score: 6.5/10
Film count 2012: 115